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  • Writer's pictureSarah Gagnon

Cross Roads of Life.

Updated: Mar 30, 2019

I am sure you have been there before too. Thinking to yourself "this is not where I thought I would be at 28. There was so much more I thought I would be doing at this age when I was younger". I have thought this numerous times throughout my 20's.

So what happened to all those big dreams and plans I had for myself when I was younger? To be completely honest I am not sure. I think it was a combination of living my life on autopilot with no clear direction other than what was directly in front of me and struggling with how to be an "adult". Now with 30 creeping at the door, I sit and daydream about life lessen I have learned, what mistakes I made along the way & what I want for the next 10 years.

Within the last year or two I have started the path of self-development. I have listened to auto-books, read blogs and signed up for inspiring weekly emails. I have made a couple of dream boards and thought about want changes I make in my life within the next year. I will say with all of this research and soul searching, life has still gotten in the way and I find myself coasting again.

The difference this time is that I am aware that I am coasting and I am okay with that (for now). Why? Because I have been going through a "growth spurt" who could say. What I mean by this is that I have gone through a period of growth and change - both personally and professionally. Am I where I want to be in my self - development journey? No, I'm not but I don't think I will ever be satisfied with the latest version of myself.

So what has happened with the last year or so for me to be okay with me coasting in life right now? Well, the most recent change I've had in my life is a job change - which was a strategic career move. When the opportunity become available to work for one of the 100 Best Companies to Work for 2018 according to Fortune, I could not let this opportunity pass me.

I have experienced relationship changes - both positive and negative. I went through a time where I was unsure about the romantic, long-term relationship I was in. He and I went through hell together during that time because I was not sure if he was the "one" - we have been together for about 7 years now. I was having doubts about our relationship - we're we together because we choose to be with one another or we're we together because we have been with each other for so long.

I have experienced losses (and gains) in friendships. I have learned that not all friendships are life - long and that some friendships are just for a season or two in your life because that is exactly who you needed during that time. I have experienced this my entire life. I have never really had a "tribe" of friends. I have always had multiple, close friends from different times or areas of my life and I am okay with this. I think at this point in my life I am starting to develop a tribe of friends with my significant other. I have gained a couple of good friends throughout the past year - both were wonderfully unexpected. My significant other and I are starting to also have more couple friends which is really nice too.

One of my goals for 2018 is to be mostly debt free with the exception of my students loans and mortgage. I have never had a good relationship with money - I can earn it but not keep it. Making a career move at the beginning of the year has opened up new opportunities for me financially - I am actually able to save money.

The cycle of living paycheck to paycheck is vicious. It is almost impossible to get ahead and save when you are caught in this cycle. And it didn't help that I was heavily relying on my credit cards which has put me more than $10K in credit card debt. I have to budget, budget, budget - and be more aware of my spending. This also means I have had a shift in how I spend my free time; for example, I cannot just go out to eat because I don't want to cook dinner or I now have to space out doing extracurricular activities with friend and family to be sure I don't spend all my extra money in one weekend.

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